Good morning and welcome to Coffee Chat!

You know, I've often wondered something since I started this little meme.
A meme that was always intended to spark conversation, dialogue; the sharing of ideas and exchange of opinions.

Thus far, on my little home on the net it's been nice.   So very nice.    But....

.... what if you all actually visited my REAL home one week?
Would the exchange of ideas still flow?   Would the sharing be a little more difficult face to face?
I would of course serve coffee, tea and fresh scones and that would be sure to illicit some sort of delicious exchange.

But then....since we are all such connected Bloggers....  What If?!
http://veryhilarious.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/awkward-silence-phone.jpg
source


 Now perhaps we would all be fine at our little real life coffee chat because I of course am Bringer of The Topics.     Assuming that might fail though; or even worse, I present what I think is a brilliant topic of discussion and y'all are like:

http://collegetimes.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/tumblr_lu7j57tFwG1qjgyuwo1_500.gif
source
Would you know how to save the conversation?


Time out for Mom



Tuesday April 29th/14

Are you good at Small Talk?  Awkward Silences?   
What are your tips on how to be a good Conversationalist?

If you read yesterday's post, Part 4 in my Thoughts on A Train series, you will know that it dealt with what feels like awkward silence while traveling with a group of passengers on a train.   We all busy ourselves with something:  a book, our phones/tablet/laptop, listen to music, sleep ... or like me stare out the window and let my thoughts free from the confining space.

Conversation is minimal and it runs the gamut from discreet whispered exchanges to the over-loud and over-sharing group of youth in the corner 4 seater.   Nothing is off limits in their conversation.  There seems to be no embarrassment regarding what they are willing to loudly and boldly share.


http://www.iwebstreet.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/193.jpg
YES!  I am already visualizing putting this over your mouth
As for myself, I find the older I get, the harder this seems to be.    I swear I used to know how to start conversations.   There definitely was a time I could easily walk into a room, not knowing anyone, and strike up a conversation.   I don't think anyone who knows me would classify me as "shy."

Hopefully not "socially awkward" either.    And yet, it seems I am becoming such.
If I have not actually forgotten the Art Of Conversation, could it be that I have less patience for BS as I age?    Or rudeness.

Case in point:  I was out the other night with people I know quite well, and right in the middle of discussing a matter with a woman within our group.  Suddenly, this other woman comes right between us and starts talking to her.   And not just "Excuse me, I'll just be a moment - this is really important."  
Hell.No.
Not only was it Not most important:  this woman didn't even acknowledge my presence, let alone the fact that I was right in the middle of a sentence.   
And the woman I was already talking to?   Never.Said.A.Word.
She started talking to the other woman.

I'm pretty sure this was my face:

Judging You

Perhaps I just wasn't very interesting to the first woman.    Perhaps I was not telling my story with my usual flair for the dramatic.  Perhaps she was just being polite in asking the question in the first place.
And perhaps the other woman, since she didn't know me..... just couldn't be bothered to observe the normal requirements of polite and civil fracking conversation.

In my younger years, it is most certain I would have called a bitch out for being a rude bitch.   But this night, I just turned away -- since I did have my 3 children also there.
And that is the other thing that concerns me:   how are we supposed to teach our children the art of conversing, if we as adults cannot even follow a few simple rules?

I may not be able to give a lecture on Polite Discourse at a big convention centre in front of hundreds of people, but I am pretty sure I know the very first and Single Most important factor:

Manners Matter People!

Seriously, as long as you practice a few little, simple rules regarding politeness, I really don't think you can go wrong.

A good rule to keep in mind:  
There is a BIG difference between the Art of Conversation... 
and the Power of Speech.  

http://syedfaizal.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Listen-sbsf.png


What are some of your conversations tips, or Ice Breakers?

Next Week:  You are in a cabin and it is pitch black. You have one match on you. Which do you light first, the newspaper, the lamp, the candle or the fire?



About The Author
Leslie Botchar, aka "RoryBore", is a SAHM enjoying life one day - and one cup of coffee - at at time.
She has had several articles published in The Huffington Post, and hopes to one day marry her skills as Word Wrangler and Photo Ninja. Leslie spills it all on her blog Time Out For Mom, and invites you to join her for some Mom "Me" Time.
Connect with her: Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram.