I believe I may have to amend my How I Blog page, that states Thursday is my digital day off.
I just can't seem to resist Pondering most weeks.
What can I say?  Brenda's a fantastic host and gives good prompt.
(that may not quite sound right out loud...)

This Thursday is Left Brain's day off, so technically, it is still mama's day off.    I would not likely have had time today to shower Ponder, if Left Brain was not also home.  Thus, so far I have slept in, blogged fireside via McDonald's free Wifi while he wrangled the kids in the playroom, and currently I am tripping down memory lane while they all cuddle up to watch Elf.   Again.

I'm not totally slack at parenting - I made strawberry-banana smoothies - which they are enjoying by the fire because:  Baby, It is Cold Outside.

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This Week's prompt: Memories

Do you have any memories that would be fascinating for someone else to read about in one hundred years? or even ten?



I have some great memories.
I have some not-so-great memories.
On any given day either one, or both, may be recalled with alternating feelings of happiness, sadness...and sometimes just an overwhelming deja vu of WTF??

Regardless of what I recall, or how I recall, or the resulting feelings -- it's still All Me.
Each little thing, good and bad, has made me who I am today.   It can be a bittersweet gratitude.

If I determine my daily feelings based solely upon my memories: I could spend a life time chasing happiness; but that seems so dependent on "happenings".
I want something that sticks.  Something that lingers more than awhile.

Not a fleeting moment of euphoria that will fade when life dumps a bucket of sorrow in my lap.
Not a mile high mountain of stuff that I climb seeking solace when the dips and valley's of life appear.
Not an impregnable tower where I hide away from everyone and everything -- so nothing bad can ever happen.

Because then -- nothing will ever happen to me.

No, I'll take All The Memories.
Even the ones that once hurt.    Mostly, I'd like the chance to turn those into something better.

Sure I'd like to write something worthwhile.   Something "with a purpose" as our esteemed host eloquently states.
Perhaps the secret to life?

Ah, that's an easy one:  it's meant to be lived
Personally, I think with abundance.

Perhaps that is why I choose to remember the lazy summer days spent on the farm; or the sound of  jingle bells as grandpa guided the sleigh through the winter wonderland of a 50 acre sugar bush on Christmas day.   And why I couldn't tell you what sought-after toy I received on that morn. Or the absence of a father on that most special day -- and all the others.  Instead, I remember crowded country kitchens and a day of food and laughter...... and love.

And sure, I can record those memories here on my digital journal; to share with my children - and the world.  So that they may also experience the wonder of snow-tipped branches; and the tinkling sound of bells mingled with the soft scrape of sleigh runners over a blanket of snow, and the birdsong that follows our journey from lofty bare branch'd perches.  

I could describe the wonderful, enticing smell of grandma's home-made buns and retell stories of how we all tried to steal them for ourselves each Christmas.

And I won't lie, it would be great if I could turn those amazing stories into a bestselling memoir.  Would that mean I have touched another human heart with something better than this shallow, selfish world might imprint?   To impart somehow that a life lived simply,or simple lived,  could also be worthy?  I would hope so.

Aside from writing something fascinating and memorable - if that's the only way I can share my journey of life with you, then I'll take it.  But you know -- the secret I said.    I'd rather bring you along on the sleigh ride so you can feel the crisp winter chill upon your own cheeks; while bells and birds serenade.

Sadly, I cannot offer you a place at my grandma's table and chat awhile while we eagerly await, with noses twitching and mouths watering, a sample of those delicious, love-infused buns.   Some things pass on before we get to share them.  All the more reason to savour life in the present.

That is exactly why the most cherished memories are the ones we took the time to make ourselves.  Where we allow life to unfold in all its sometimes imperfect splendour.   They are the ones that linger on and become something more through each re-telling.

So while I do enjoy writing and sharing my stories; it's also why I will be bundling 3 children up in a worn out minivan and travelling snow covered highways in the early hours of Christmas Eve, to get to Grandma and Grandpa's house.

While it is a lovely thing for my children to hear my own memories of Christmas pasts and know from where they come.  It is also important I ensure they start creating their own memorable life in the present.    What a future they will have before them with both past and living memories to guide them.

I would love to read that story.

Giddy up, giddy up - Let's Go!!  The trial awaits.