It's been awhile since I did a Manic Monday post.
Which clearly demonstrates just how life strings you merrily along, while you are patting yourself on the back for being Oh So Together Mom.   Then life, just like that,'s some REALITY.   Careful how you go there....don't wanna tr......DOH!  
That's gonna leave a mark.

Thus today I find myself a scrambled egg mess with a side of burnt toast.   Which reminds me, I haven't actually eaten.   Meaning I've had my breakfast coffee....but not what normal people consider breakfast.   Probably because it is much more fun to make playdoh on your stove in the morning.   Certainly not because you forgot to make said playdoh for daughter's JrK class last week.   And over the weekend.   Which reminds me.....I was going to clean my floors this weekend too.  Because there is dried up bits of playdoh stuck to it.   Or maybe it's Kraft Dinner.   Not sure.

(and good grief Spell Check -- No, I don't mean Playboy!)

Never mind that somewhere in the night a Black hole seems to have opened inside our house and sucked in all manner of items.   Son's water bottle, a book of matches that were in the bathroom, my favourite slippers, all kinds of toys.    But I did a find a missing sock.    It appears the universe is in fact, all about Balance.

Perhaps a list will restore some order.   

Greta has chosen this week's Listicle Topic, which fits very nicely into this Manic Monday morning late afternoon post. 
 I'll Never: 10 Things You Said You'd Never Do But Have Caught Yourself Doing.

1.   Well it goes without saying:  making home-made playdoh when they are conveniently located at my local Walmart.  And come in such super cute air tight packages.  Because the Black Hole also swallowed all my Ziploc bags.

2.   That I would ever become addicted to coffee.   Did I really think as student that I could have a Molson Canadian and Sara Lee's chocolate cake for breakfast for the rest of my life?

3.  That I would work in an Office - surrounded by 4 grey walls All Day Long and chained to a phone.   Oh Lord save me.   (Oddly enough - no surprise that I would work in a prison, whose walls, fencing, security cameras, guard dogs.... didn't bother me at all.)

4.  That I would ever be a wife or mom.  (see About Me page).  Tie me down?   Never.

5.   God has a sense of humour - especially when you say "never."  Because wife and mom to 3 wasn't enough comeuppance - Now: stay home with them, and ask  The Man for money when required.

6.   Drive a minivan.   This will never be my idea of cool.  And that's a never you can count on.   I don't care if it has sliding doors- they stick.   I don't care if it has DVD player - the darn thing is behind me.  And I don't care how many horses you put in the engine:  it's a freaking gloried on roids Taxi!

7.    Gain weight.   Yeah, just smack me through the screen:  I won't dodge.   Because that would be considered exercise - why I never do anymore.   Which I am sure would surprise the heck out of my 25 year old self who went Every Day.

8.   Saying things like:  

If I have told you once, I've told you a hundred times....

Is that poop on your hands, or chocolate?   (and actually smell it to see)

Don't make me come up, down, or in there!

9.   Sunday School Teacher.  Yeah, I am shocked too.   But despite some wrong (but highly interesting) turns in my youth, it would seem that the apple does not in fact roll far from the tree.

10.   Become a trapped stay at home, coffee addicted, playdoh making, minivan driving, sounding like my mother, teaching and preaching, Contented Mess.

What's on your Never-Never List?

P.S.   You know you want to try it:   Make Your Own Playdoh (scroll to bottom of page)

warm wishes sign